HAHA MICHAUD
MisterMichaud makes me laugh.

MisterMichaud said...
I know you've been taking alot of self-portraits lately, so I really hope that isn't your cock I'm looking at... again, and again... and again...
2:28 PM
MisterMichaud said...
Oh great... it just occured to me that if anyone ever does a google search for "MisterMichaud cock" that they'll wind up here.You can thank me for the thousands of hits later.
2:29 PM

GOD BLESS you buddy...I really hope it does come up in everyones search..Everyone do a search for Mistermichauds cock.

SOME RANDOM PICS THAT I LIKE

LOL I don't think I need to say anything about this one!

This picture is perfect!! Great way to explain the bush mentality. For years Hitler was commiting disgusting act of Genocide and waging war on the countries around him while his people sat happy In there houses sipping tea and going to the theatre. Goes to show you what keep information from your own people can do for your popularity.. (like not showing the bodies of fallen soldiers coming home so the people don't have to face the facts and realize what is really going on) And i'm pround to say our own Stephen "the tag along" Harper is folling in what ever big brother bush says to do. That's fucking disgusting.. We are our own country, why make the same mistakes another dictator has already made.

I personally Loved Clinton. He was a fantastic president who did alot for that country..So what he had an affair with another woman. There blessed Kennedy open admitted to fucking Marilyn Monroe... ???? Makes no sense...Bring him back....Let him fuck who ever he want's, as long as he's not waging fake wars for oil.

Lookig for people to Come up with Other captions for this photo.

I'll start...

"YES, But can your president to THIS!!!"

DRINKING AND JAIL AND NUDITY OH MY!!

Part 1

I don't know how many times i've been asked to tell this story...but it is alot!! So I just thought it easier to write it down. So here you go with, "Adventures in the drunk tank."

Not to many years ago while i was still working in the tattoo industry, I left work late around midnight to go meet some friends at the bar for our weekly wednesday night drunk at O'learys pub in Saint John.

After a few pints of brew sitting on the patio out back with a group of friends speaking in badly acted english accents a stranger comes and sits with us. To drunk to realize where he's at we took him in and shared some laughs. Eventually out of no where this stranger stands up and call's the smallest one of our friends a faggot!! Insulted but respecting the establishment we all just stand and tell this fool that he had better go before he get's the hell beat out of him. Slowly and sluring under his breath the moron staggers off through the door. Not 10 seconds later he comes back through the door wielding a patio chair and huff's it across the table at a girl I had been seeing. Realising what he had done he immediatly turn and books it out the door.

At that point, our whole table in single file, stands and follows this idiot out the door of the bar. Once outside we stand in a restricting circle around him so he can't escape allowing the girl to get a couple good punch's in before he began to flee back to the bar. The bouncers met us at the door trying to stop everyone from getting back in. At this time my best friend in one sweet motion punchs the moron in the back of the head followed by a straight kick to the middle of his spine, sending him hurdling back into the bar.

So the idiot, the antagonizer was allowed back in the bar but us, the faithfull patrons of the establishment we left out in the cold? FUCK THAT!!! We immediatly head back around the bar and enter through the patio door.

Scanning the room looking for this idiot in a crowd of drunks, the two bouncers approach my friend and I telling us we have to leave. We responded with a very abrassive, "FUCK YOU". The bouncers not use to that type of attitude in a fairly layed back bar just turn and walk away.. LOL...Good job boys...way to take pride in your work.

Thinking we lost the Idiot Stick, we begin to head back to the patio, when a strange girl say's "aren't you going to do anything to that asshole?", pointing him out for us in the crowd. I immediatly grab her beer and throw it through the crowd. THUCK!! the bottle cracks him in the back of the head, amazingly not breaking. Instantly the guy stagers for the door, heading outside and up the street.

My friend and I take off through the back alley to try and cut them off. We do, and find him being walked down the street by another guy and a girl. Obviously his friends that weren't bothered to stick up for him in the bar...Good friends!!

Thes two try cutting us off, the Girl screaming at me, "WHAT'S YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM? HE'S SORRY LEAVE HIME ALONE!! HIT ME IF YOU WANT TO HIT SOMEONE!!."

So I told her if she wanted, I would hit her once as hard as I could, then we would call it even for there friend throwing a chair at my date. Suprisingly she backed down. Just then the other guy started getting lippy, so my friend picked up a good sized rock and threatend him with it.. And AMAZINGLY, he backed down too. During all this commotion the target, or the moron as i like to call him vanished around the corner. How stupid we thought and took off after him.

Not one block down the road we stop.. He's gone! Where the hell could he have gone? We decide that he must have gotten into a cab or ran into one of the apartment buildings. They only way we were getting an answer was to interrogate the happy couple following us. My best friend had his rock so i decided i needed a torture tool for my self. I found a nice BIG rock..and I mean big, this puppy was a 20lbs two hander.

Once the couple caught up with us we immediatly started wtih the question's. "Where is he? where did he go? where are you from? Waving our rocks around like mad men. They told us there were from out of town, staying at the Holiday Inn. MISTAKE!!..That's when we told them we were all getting in a cab and heading to the hotel so this Moron can get his beatings. That when RICKY (that's what i decided to call him, and amazingly he answered to it) started to get lippy. My friend yells at him, "Shut you mouth or im gonna smash you with this little rock and while your laying on the ground my buddy is gonna drop the big one on your face!!!" WELL!!!

The girl falls to the ground crying, just balling her eyes out, Ricky stands there petrified. My friend and i just start Laughing our ass's off realizing the situation we have gotten ourselves into.

Then we tell Ricky to take us to the moron or we will take the beating out on him. That's when the girl stands up with tears in her eyes and screams, "Don't Hurt HIM I LOVE HIM!!!!" LOL hahahaha. That shit was too funny. I drop my rock i'm laughing so hard and say, "well your in the clear now your just to pathetic to hit." That's when she starts running down the road towards the crowd at the intersection screaming , "HELP HELP"

We start walking and I tell Ricky to come with us, My friend raise's his rock to heard him along. As we get closer to the intersection we see her running from person to person asking for help. Little did she know they were all friends of mine. I scream,"Don't help that cunt!!"

Just then people all around her start to laughing, she panics and runs across the street to a passing police car. OOPPSSSS..

The police officer gets out and comes over to see what the problem is. SoI told him.. There friend hit my girl friend with a chair and i wanted to beat the shit out of him. That's when the cops say, "Just go home your drunk!"

So i said, "FINE, i'll tell you what i just got a brand new patio furniture set...I'll go home work it in on some bitchs face then you can come over and tell me what a good job i did." WRONG!! Not the right thing to say in retrospect.

Just then I hear, "GET HIM!!" when suddenly i was swarmed by 4 cops and hand cuffed. As i'm being led to the paddy wagon another friend walks around the corner oblivious to the situation and yells, "what's going on?" The cop says, "you wanna go to the drunk tank too?"

He responds, "SURE!!" So now he's cuffed and thrown in the back of another cruiser.. TSK TSK TSK...quite the situation. Who would have thought they would make such a big deal over alittle torture of a couple tourists.. Not me!

Well I will continue the other half later...An evening in the tank..

To be continued

10 THING'S I'D LIKE TO DO

10: Go to a support meeting for Deaf People and act sympathetic while pretend that there Blind.

9: Go to a support meeting for Blind people and rob them.

8: Get a job as a day care worker.....(enough said on that one)

7: Get fired from my day care job and collect unemployment while plotting my next deviant act.

6: Have a group of naked fat people paint themselves like whales and organize a suprise parade through a busy down town district.

5: Take the next bible pusher that comes to my door and tie him down to a chair while I perform the worlds nastiest lap dance.

4: Magicaly replace all the Crack and Heroine in the world with estrogen pills.

3: Make a person with no arms do a hand stand at gun point.

2: Actually take the time to listen when people talk to me.. (most likely won't happen)

1: Have sex with a prostitute, tell her I love her and then propose just to try and get out of paying her for her services.

DO THEY??

I saw this and just had to comment. I guess the first thing that came into my mind is, do retarted children actually think about fucking. Are we that imbedded with the natural instinct to reproduce and populate that even retarted children feel there loins burning for passion? All I can say is I hope so.

The image of two mentally retarted people (Kids or adults) going at it gives me a feeling of glee. A feeling like I just watched the best comedy of my life.

How akward can a sexual experience get you ask? Well picture Mr. Autism and Mrs. Syndrome, laying uncomfortably in a bed facing each other. Each one adorned in there favourite evening wear. (Most likely a diaper and a scuba diving mask). Neither one sure where to start or why there even there. All Mr. Autism knows is that his elephant trunk has been leading him to water, while Mrs. Syndrome lays motionless in her Scuba Diving mask thinking about the genius who discovered penut butter and jam were made for each other.

Eventually Mr. Autism let's the trunk out to get a drink, but instead of casualy sliding it into Mrs. Syndromes honey pot, he grabs it by both sides and begins pissing all over Mrs. Syndromes face. At that exact moment Mrs. Syndrome realizes wearing the scuba mask must have been fate and that her and Mr. autism were ment to be together like Peanut butter and Jam.

They lived a happy Life together pissing, laughing and clapping through there sexual escapades..

Well that's how I think it would happen.

At least it would be funny to see.

Does Anyone Else See A Connection Here???

I can't turn the God Damn TV on now adays, or open a news paper or magazine with out the horrible state of our nations Obese Children staring back at me. Staring at me, telling me it's my fault there fat, that it's TV's fault for making them Lazy, that it's video games stripping away there ambition's, that hey have a glandular problem.

Now they have pretty much completely stripped the schools of junk food in the caffeterias and vending machines. How could I have been so stupid all this time. The answer was right there in front of my face.....VENDING MACHINES!!!! Of course, that one candy bar or bag of chips is causing our nations youth to explode in obesity. There I go again never seeing the obvious.....stupid, stupid, stupid me. (but not fat)

The only thing getting hurt with the vending machines being taken out of schools is the income of the person who ownes them. Well at least Mr. or Mrs vending machines kids won't be fat, because they won't have enough money eat anymore.. But I guess that's ok as long as the Governments feel like they've done something.

Of course if it was my decision I might be inclined to point my finger at the Insainly obese atrocity standing over them. The one buying the Groceries at the candy store. The one eating 6 meals a day infront of the TV watching Jerry Springer and drinking 6L of Pepsi a day. "But it's ok," they say, "It's only diet pepsi. FUCK YOU....Cow's eat grass all day and there fat..Find a better excuse.

So It's not ok to beat or neglect your child or social services will come and take them away, though it is OK to feed them into early heart disease or death.

My hat goes off to these parents for there complete lack of responsibility.

TOUCHEE!!!

AM I THE ONLY ON WHO SEE'S THIS CONNECTION


So I've met alot of people that think pugs are one of the cutest thing ever created.................uummmm...aahh.....eerrr...Can this be true? Do people really believe this? This is the question i ask myself everytime someone shows me another pic of the next cutest, adorable pic of a pug they found.

WELL.......The question I ask is...are they really that cute? In my opinion A pug looks like a Baby with Down Syndrome. And I think most people would agree that a baby with Down Syndrome is just plain sad.."Poor unfortunate baby" they would say. "The mother must have been a heavy drinker", They would think.

But on the other hand they see a Pug and woo and aawwww over it. Talking about how cute it looks being exploited for our amusment in it's little pink wool over coat they bought at the local pet store.

The part for me I guess i can't get past is, THEY BOTH LOOK ALIKE!!!.
So if a baby with Down Syndrome is just plain sad, then why is a pug cute.

IT'S NOT!! FUCK OFF AND BUY A REAL DOG!!

TRUST WHO?? I DON'T THINK SO!!

So myself with the rest of Christian believers are just expected to trust, to believe, have faith in some man name Jesus, some man that walked the face of the earth (possibly, but not likely) over 2000 years ago. The original pimp of the Christian's or the "O.P.C" As i'm going to reffer to him. Sure he dosen't have a bomb strapped to his chest or an AK47 in his hands, to command your attention, but what he does have is fear. The fear of H-E-L-L!!! Screw him and screw that.

You expect me to trust this guy??.......

FUCK THAT!! Though he does have a charming smile. But really dosen't every great con-man have a charming smile and a silver tongue. Sure he has the whole Martyr thing going for him....But baaahhh!!! what ever...He probly just stole a loaf of bread from the market and deserved what he got. (but that wouldn't make for good story telling)

Well I've decided to believe in my own God for the time being.......

He smokes, he wears cool Glasses, he dosen't groom himself very well and he can definatly bring plesure to the world.

Any suggestions or names would be welcomed. If Scientology Has there Lord Xenu, over lord of the universe then I don't see why Happy cock here can't have his own Religion, to get stinking filthy rich off of too.

(I would like to apologize for putting lord xenu in capitols....scientology dosen't deserve it)

So Apparently I've had a few adventures in my life, that people keep telling me I should write down somewhere, "Share them with the world" I'm told. So I guess this is it.

Not sure if I should start with Innocence or Depravity. Both have there strong points, but let's face it, there really isn't anything that funny about innocence. Though on the other had, Fat people, Midgets, God, Retards, Homosexuals with a severe limp and stutter....Now there's something to laugh at. The special olympics....Honestly what's so special about it..Are they performing heart surgeory, sending people into space...No, there running around a track at one tenth the speed of a NORMAL OLYMPICS athelete, there doing the long jump with one fake leg, a crooked smile and eyes so crossed they've never been able to tell how many fingers they actually have.

So obviously, Definatly, of course it's easy to pick on and make fun of. And I do. I've laughed so hard some times at a drunk driving commercial or the little guy with severe down syndrome thanking the public for giving him a chance to stock shelves, that i almost peed myself.

Yes it's Sad, but sometimes sad is funny.